This Old Car…

This old car ❤ This old car is more than just an old car.
Topsy the 1952 FX Holden 48/215 has been in the family since my pop brought her back in the 50’s.

She’s been around the countryside as pop took her to many dances around the Gunnedah and Narrabri area, she’s even been over to Forster for holidays.
My mother recalls one Easter where pop took her and my uncle over to Bendemeer for the day in Topsy where they had chocolate eggs by the beautiful river there.

As a child I remember her sitting up in the back shed at nan and pops in pieces then finally in my 20’s my uncle restored her to her former glory. She is a hard old thing to drive with no power steering and column shift gear stick!I once drove her around Boggabri.
Topsy has seen two weddings in her time, she was a wedding car when nan and pop were married back in 1961 and when Jade and I got married in April 2016.
I had always wanted her as my wedding car as I love her so much.

Unfortunately pop passed away back in 2013 when I was in Europe, thankfully we got to say my goodbyes the week before we left.

Having Topsy at the wedding was my way of having pop there and I was so glad she didn’t miss a beat coming over the Moonbi’s. (For those who don’t know the Moonbi’s are rather steep hills between Tamworth and Armidale, but so beautiful!)

I am sure pop wanted to be there for the wedding.

This old car is more than an old car, she is family and will be family for many more years to come.

Photos by the amazing Anna at http://www.annatennephotography.com
(Check out the best of weddings there’s quite a few from our wedding!)

The Best of 2015 – Part Two!

This gallery contains 50 photos.

I am…

This morning whilst driving to work I was thinking about a couple of potential clients who said they’d ask their husbands about a session..
Now it’s all fine and well if you want to run stuff by your husband, he might be the only one bringing money into the family.
But why should I run what I want by my husband? I work, I earn my money. If I want something I’ll bloody well go get it. I’m an independent woman and I think more women should be empowered to do things for themselves, want that bag? Get it, you earnt it. If you want something you get it, don’t let a man hold you back from getting what you want because I did many moons ago and I won’t let that happen ever again.

At age 19 I was in an abusive relationship.
Now this wasn’t a physically abusive relationship, this was a mental one. He chipped away at me for nearly a year, telling me I would never own a new car, I would never get anywhere with my photography, I’d never amount to anything.
My family and friends hated him, I would give up going to see friends and my family because he didn’t want me to. I ended up moving to my current town with him and managed to get a job at one of the pubs. He hated that too, he hated the very fact that some guy could be hitting on me at work. Clearly he had serious issues.
I had a miscarriage in the early months of the relationship and I thank my bloody lucky stars that it happened. I didn’t know I was pregnant so you can imagine the shock of the discovery of what I thought were bad period pains turning out to be a miscarriage.
I was bloody lucky, I can’t even imagine what would of happened to me if I didn’t lose the baby.
I guess I would be stuck on some farm in some little shitty house, being used and abused. More than likely being cheated on every weekend. I would have been a broken woman.
Thankfully I began to see the toxicity of that relationship, I worked myself up to break up with him, I remember that night at work in the cool-room with one of the other girls crying because I wanted to get out.
I went to do it and crumbled. I couldn’t do it.
My spirit had been crushed.

It was only when he raised his hand at me that I decided that was it.
Something inside me snapped at that very moment and I realized if I didn’t get out now I wasn’t getting out.
I was devastated not because I had lost the relationship, I was devastated that I had to leave my amazing job and the few friends I had made in town. I’ll never forget that day when I had to ring up the pub in tears and tell them I had to quit, I didn’t have anywhere to stay to keep working there.
I’ll never forget the day mum drove two and a half hours to help me take all of my stuff in one trip. My poor old 1988 Holden Barina was packed to the max.
I’ll never forget the trip over the mountains to home where I was safe.
I’ll never forget the day I granted myself my own freedom.

That was nearly 9 years ago. I found myself again and whilst I was broken for a little while after escaping. I grew strong again, I became independent and confident again. I got myself that brand new car I was told I would never have, I established myself as someone, as a great photographer.
Today I want to say thank you to my ex, had I not followed you here I would not have meet my husband, I would not have met my fabulous friends, I would not have gotten myself an awesome job in radio and I would not of gotten my new car.
Your patronizing attitude to me made me stronger, made me tenacious again made me want to prove you wrong and oh boy didn’t I.
You made me this way and I am glad.

I am.
A survivor .

 

10 long years with darkness

Today I am 28.
Since I was 18, I’ve had anxiety about getting older, I always felt like my time was running out and that I had done nothing with my life, I would not be remembered.
It was a deep seeded carried over habit from a past life I am sure.
Every year March would be hell for me and I would usually end up crying to myself quietly on my birthday, I know that’s bad luck!. Things got worse as I got older, all my friends were having babies and getting engaged, every time this happened the anxiety would kick in, I would feel upset, like I wasn’t good enough for my long term boyfriend and I would wonder, “When was it my turn?”.
I distinctly remember crying when one of my friends told me she was engaged, they weren’t happy tears they were tears of upset. My boyfriend and I had been together 3 years at the time, I was 23 at the time and in my eyes that was when everyone got engaged. I was happy for her but devastated for myself. Time was running out.
I knew that I was being stupid and I would tell myself I was being ridiculous, your time will come. But I could not stop it.
Life for me was supposed to be worked out by 25, I was supposed to married and starting a family at that age.
I was none of those things, I was working my arse off with my photography capturing beautiful memories for my clients, I was also working on becoming a better announcer at the radio station.
We had our first overseas holiday to Europe in 2013 where I thought surely he would do it there. This was a perfect opportunity. It didn’t have to be on the Eiffel Tower, it could have been in London, Edinburgh or Amsterdam.
It wasn’t my time yet.

Before our overseas holiday I became friends with some psychic ladies and my word I cannot tell you how much they helped put me on the right path.
I was angry all the time, for no reason. I just hated the world and the people in it, I had a terrible temper and was a loose cannon some days. After connecting with my spirit guide in 2012/2013 I was told to stop trying to make it happen, stop worrying about it that my time would come. I was dubious, I’m a control freak, I like to know what is happening and when and if it’s not happening fast enough I will step in and make it happen.
It’s who I am.
So I tried to stop pushing it, I did my best.
2013 was a game changer for me, this was the year I stopped being angry with everyone and everything (I still don’t know why I was angry but my word I was), it was the year I finally got to return home to Europe, it was the year my photography took off.

My boyfriend started mentioning that it would be happening soon at the end of 2013 so I couldn’t tell how ecstatic I was when I suggested we have a look at rings in March 2014 before we went to Bali and he agreed.
I got to pick my stunning engagement ring and this stemmed the anxiety
about getting older for a little while.
That Birthday my 26^th I had another anxiety attack about getting older and having done nothing with my life. So clearly getting married wasn’t the problem here,
it was about getting older.
My boyfriend finally proposed in September 2014 whilst we were on holidays in the Red Centre, Finke Gorge to be precise and I’m going to have to say happiest day of my life so far, we had no service for most of the day which was a killer because
I couldn’t wait to tell the family.

Last year, 2015, my 27^th birthday was the worst birthday.
Anxiety about getting older and still having done nothing with my life, feeling like I had no true friends here in town. (Everyone I classed as a true friend lives away) I broke down at work. I HATE crying at work and showing weakness it’s not who I am and what I do. God Damn it I am a strong person, I don’t cry.
I knew I wasn’t alone like I was feeling in my mind, I knew I had a few friends here in town and one at work yet I could tell myself that over and over again but my mind would not believe. I knew I had done things with my life, I was successful,
yet I could not believe myself.
It was a miserable day.

Today I turn 28, today is the first day I have not had anxiety about getting older and having done nothing. Today I didn’t cry on my Birthday.
Today I kicked anxiety’s butt.
I’m 28, I’m a kick arse photographer, I’ve written an epic book series and
I’m an awesome radio announcer.
I HAVE done something with my life.

The BEST of 2015 (In lots of 50)

So I barely blogged last year, truth be told I didn’t really have time!
But heres the best of 2015!
(In lots of 50)

The Red Centre Days 10 to 12

Day 10 – Alice Springs

Up at 4am to be picked up by 5am.
Why?
We went Hot Air Ballooning and it was amazing!

 

If you ever want to go hot air ballooning go with Outback ballooning the guys are fabulous!

Day 11 – Alice Springs

This was just a rest day, we went into town did some shopping, I didn’t take the camera with me though.

Day 12 – Chambers Pillar

4WD day again!

We got up fairly early and headed out to Chambers Pillar.

I was an idiot and didn’t take a bottle of water with me because this was a ‘short’ walk, completely buggered myself in doing so!

How cool are all the old dates etched into the rock? Here’s my fabulous ring again!

And here is the drive home…

The Red Centre – Days 7 to 9

Day 7 – Yulara – Alice Springs Via Kings Canyon. (626kms)

This was just a purely driving day and I didn’t take many photos. (The following are all instagram photos so excuse the not so great quality)

Although I did see one of these trees out in the middle of nowhere…

Our first sighting of the West Macs!

We checked into the fabulous Big 4 holiday park which was by far the best park I’ve stayed in in Australia!

Then went out for dinner at The Overlander Steak House in The Alice where I had The Drovers Blow out consisting of Soup (Served from a billy) a platter of Croc Vol Au Vents (My god I love Croc!), A Kangaroo Fillet, Emu Medallion and Camel Fillet (Camel is also awesome!)
This was followed by a Steak and an amazing Pavloa.
Jade just HAD to try a Darwin Stubby for those who don’t know what that is…

He drank it all and I had to drive back to the room that night…

Day 8 – The West Macs

Day 8 saw us exploring the West Macs, there is some absolutely beautiful country out there with lots of water holes where alot of people were swimming.
First stop was Simpsons Gap.

Then Standley Chasm, I saw a baby brown snake and calmly freaked out (AKA did not scream) about it then I was paranoid for the rest of the trip as I HATE snakes!

Then onto Ellery Gap Big Hole…

The ochre pits, this was actually really cool to see!

Then finally Ormiston Gorge, this place was BEAUTIFUL!

Day 9 – Finke Gorge NP and Owens Springs Reserve

This was by far our FAVOURITE day and kind of the whole point of this trip to go Four Wheel Driving!
We stopped alot along the way and at the spot below, Jade proposed to me!

Here is the ring please excuse my wonky little finger!

Happiest day of my life so far!
Jade absolutely LOVED the real four wheel driving over the rocks and I have to admit it was pretty darm fun and also scary in some places!
After Finke Gorge we went on to do the Owens Springs Reserve track which after Finke was super easy!

That night we went out for dinner at one of the fancier places in town to celebrate!
(Once again I ate a variety of Aussie animals…)

The Red Centre Days 4 to 6

DAY FOUR – Coober Pedy to Yulara (734kilometres)

Distances are long out here and the roads so straight it gets REALLY boring.

7am – We left the kooky little town of Coober Pedy (It reminded me of Lightning Ridges big brother) and not far out on the Stuart Highway we saw our first road train!

Both of us probably got a little too excited about it…

There wasn’t really that much to take photos of along the highway until we reached the border!

And there was a hoard load of tourists on a bus there so I had to wait around 15 -20 minutes just to get a photo without a person in it.

Welcome to the NT!

And of course with the Northern Territory came this…

My partner Jade was ridiculously excited to drive faster…

We stopped at Erldunda to grab some lunch (I think I had a Pluto pup, yeah I know totally healthy) then headed downt he Lasseter Highway on to Yulara.

There it is!

After checking in to our accommodation The Ayers Rock Campground, our cabin was small and did not have an ensuite so it was a long walk to the toilets (You’d think for the price they would atleast include a toilet in the cabin!)
We headed off to take a proper look at The Rock.

Yup… we had to do this everytime we wanted to go into the park….

Uluru is MASSIVE in person, the photos make it look tiny! After driving around it completely awestruck we stopped to take some photos.

The climb was closed everyday we went but out of respect to the traditional owners and the fact we’re both pretty unfit we chose not to climb.

After taking too many photos we went to one of the sunset viewing areas and I once again took way too many photos.
I loved the feeling of the red sand on my bare feet #trueaussie running around barefoot in the desert lol!
We were treated to an ok sunset, I was a little disappointed in it to be honest.

Yeah ok its pretty I was just expecting more!

We then headed back to our little cabin and chilled for a while before heading off to dinner which was a barbeque affair where you could try a heap of different Aussie animals.
Naturally I got a bit of everything because I wanted to try everything.
Kangaroo, Emu, Crocile, Barra unfortunately there was no Buffalo left.

DAY FIVE – Kata Tjuta

I was the crazy one that wanted to see the sunrise so we were up at 5am and on our way heading into the park (The park closes everynight after sunset and opens around 5am.
Kata Tjuta is about 50 ks away my Uluru so it was a bit of a drive out there.
It was also COLD and bloody windy, stupid me didn’t bring an ideal jumper so I had to steal Jades and he stayed in the ute and slept whilst I brave the freezing cold with a couple from Melbourne.
It was extremely peaceful and very beautiful.

Worth it don’t cha think?

After the sunrise I dropped Jade off who wasn’t feeling very well then headed back out to Kata Tjuta by myself to do some of the easier walks (I’m so unfit its ridiculous)

These were little water stations which I thought was a fabulous idea!

Yeah I didn’t feel up to going beyond here even though I wanted to desperately.

I then went and did Walpa Gorge, this was a fantastic walk. Theres just something I love about the big high walls either side of me!

I then went back had some lunch and picked Jade up who had slept all morning so we could spend some time at Uluru again then head back out to Kata Tjuta for the sunset.
Here he is trying to be a photographer…

DAY SIX – Uluru

Up early once again, this time for a Sunrise camel ride.

Camels are much easier to ride than elephants!

We also got to feed a baby camel, she was so cute I wanted to take her home with me.
After the camel ride we headed on to do some walks around Uluru and try to avoid the bus loads of tourists.
The climb opened that afternoon but we did not attempt it.
Later that day around sunset the most amazing thing happen.
There was a STORM! I had been hoping to see rain on the rock whilst we were there, unfortunately it did not rain but to witness a storm rolling over Uluru was one experience I will not forget!

The Red Centre 2014 – The first 3 Days.

Back in September my partner and I took our yearly holiday, this year was to The Red Centre!

On DAY ONE we travelled from Boggabri (MY hometown) to Broken Hill a whopping 988 kilometre trip leaving at 5am we arrived at Broken Hill around 4 ish.
Checked into the FABULOUS Palace Hotel and went out to explore the place a little as we were moving on the next day…

These trees were everywhere on the road to Broken Hill, we just had to stop and take photos (I Thought it was so funny and a good way to break up the long boring drive!)

Also there is a ridiculous amount of GOATS on the side of the road, they seem to be car smart and we didn’t see too many dead ones on the side of the road.

                                                                          THIS is why I booked the Palace Hotel!

The rooms were also reasionably priced, I do love a bit of pub accommodation!

The Sculpture park is also worth a look its about 10 k’s out of town.

DAY TWO – BROKEN HILL – MAREE (Via The Flinders Ranges – 953kms)

Day Two we awoke bright and early (6.30am) and headed off to the South Australian Border…

Its quite flat and boring, we spotted alot of Kangaroos, Emus you know he kind of stuff that the foreigners get excited about!
Well I get excited about THESE kind of things!
A random Hills Hoist in the middle of no-where.
Naturally we stopped and checked it out, we didn’t have any old clothes to leave though.
After that the scenery got quite pretty around the Peterborough area, well greener and more hilly, I was excited about the old homestead ruins!
Time was pushing though and I never got the chance to photograph any.

We hit the Flinders Ranges about lunchtime, so we stopped and had our ham and cheese rolls out of the ARB fridge then decided to go for a drive through the ranges we checked out the Bunyeroo/Brachina Gorge areas (STUNNING)
I absolutely adored the Flinders Ranges even though I had no service!
Stunning, stunning place!
After the Flinders Ranges we continued onto Maree and into the vast expanse of the desert were diesel got dearer and dearer.

The best part about this drive?

THE RUINS!

We stopped at nearly everyone so I could take photos.

We nearly hit an Emu outside of Maree and finally just as the shadows were getting longer we arrived at The Maree Hotel.

DAY THREE – MAREE – COOBER PEDY VIA THE OODNADATTA TRACK (372km)

A shorter day today (Kilometres wise), Day Three was the Oodnadatta Track!
It was very lonely on this road and the first time we saw another vehicle was about halfway through!

Yes I hate the UHF aerial being on my side of the car obstructing my photos!
The Oodnadatta track was in GREAT condition when we drove it, I could have drivin my little Mazda 2 on it easily and it had some great attractions on the way.
Lake Eyre

Hot Springs

Old cars that made great photo ops.

And of course ruins from when they were building the Telegraph line.

We stopped at the famous William Creek Hotel

Where diesel was $2.25 a litre!

In Coober Pedy we stayed in an underground hotel and had dinner in an underground restaurant!

The Elders

Everyone who knows me knows I love a bit of crazy!
And when Tash contacted me to create beautiful memories of her crazy family I jumped at the chance.
(I have shot Tash twice last year and she is downright fabulous!)
So as expected craziness ensued and we got the most fabulous and natural family photos in their home!
Don’t you just adore lifestyle shoots?
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